Lunching at Bitchport: The Blue Tangerine

Working south of the city, I sometimes meet up with my fellow suburban workers for lunch at Bridgeport Village, a.k.a. Bitchport.

Friday, my friend Erin and I hit up The Blue Tangerine for a little Mediterranean food for lunch. Free appetizer with two entrees - we were excited. We got a huge dish of tzatziki with pita bread. It was appropriately tangy. It was way too much sauce, though for the amount of bread and indeed for any two people. It probably could have served four or five, easily.

I ordered the gyro and Erin had the kebob - both were very tasty, though not spectacular. Though I do have to say that the roasted tomato served with my sandwich WAS spectacularly perfect - seasoned just right, no salt and pepper needed. Thank you for that. And I do love their dishes! Crate and Barrel according to the waiter - I happen to have the same appetizer plates!

It was Mediterranean food for reasonably reasonable prices, considering we were at Bridgeport Village. I think my sandwich was 9.50 and the kebob was 12 or something around that. The atmosphere was quiet and the service prompt and attentive. All of this was good for a non-stop talk fest for me and my former co-worker.

We walked outside when we were done, which prompted Erin to declare: "I hate this place. Let's never come here again. I hate all these rich stay-at-home-moms** with their fancy cars and clothes." Food - good. Bitchport - mood killer. Maybe because of their perfectly dyed hair or their pink Ann Taylor outfits or the ginormous Hummers that they drive. Maybe because they have the freedom and money that we all want and they spend it on excessive ridiculousness. Oh wait. I do that too. Except I'm not rich. Damn.

Maybe that's why I go there sometimes after work when I'm alone. I do like feeling rich for a couple of hours, doesn't everyone?

**Not that there's anything wrong with stay-at-home-moms. I love all of you dearly. Unless you leave your kids with a nanny while you spend all day shopping at Bitchport in your Hummer. Then, not so much.

Greek Cusina (404 SW Washington)

Over the past 7 or 8 years, I've visited Greek Cusina on a number of occasions. Two company parties, weekly karaoke, blind date and just recently, went there for dinner just because.

Our waitress was imported fresh from California, orange skin, bleach blonde hair, scratchy voice. She kept talking about how busy she was. "Oh my God, there are so many people at the tables outside. I'm like whoa." Then she talked about how they might dine and dash. "Sorry, I'll be back in a minute. There's this totally big table outside that I'm scared they might leave without paying. That's what they like to do - sit on the very edge and then leave without paying. Especially with the Brewer's Festival going on." This is the second experience I've had with a waitress telling me about diners who dash. And that establishment is only a block away from Greek Cusina. I wonder if it's the neighborhood?

The food - sucks. The steak strips I ordered were mealy and mushy. The mushrooms marinated in something yellow were not good. The brie was questionable. I have never realized how bad the food is, because I am usually distracted by trying to avoid the ouzo tasting, breaking plates, watching someone make a fool of themselves while singing their guts out and being jealous of them, my stomach being in knots because I don't know the person I am on a date with. But this time, it was just dinner. It was plain and simple and disgusting.

Definitely not worth the time or the money. Skip it. Unless you are going to break some plates and drink a lot of ouzo. There's no karaoke anymore - a big loss to the karaoke community. That was seriously some good fun.

Habibi (1012 SW Morrison St.)

Chelsea and I tried a new restaurant the other night. Kind of. Habibi (from what I can tell from my amateur research online) is owned by the same people that own Nicholas' Restaurant and Arabian Breeze, both of which have really yummy food. Except that the first and last time I ate at Arabian Breeze I got violently ill for two days. I'm not sure if it was the food (which was great) or the flu, but from my mental association with the place, I'm still not able to go back.

Habibi seemed like baby steps back to Arabian Breeze, so we tried it. We sat down and saw this on our table. It was there to hold bread (on her head). I thought it was kind of cool and amusing. Chelsea thought it was freaky.

Then I ordered a Habibi Lemonade (lemonade with mint). Which tasted lovely, but see that brown thing in my glass? That's the fresh mint leaf. It actually tasted fine. Until Chelsea said. "That leaf is rotting in your glass." Um, okay. I took it out.

For dinner, I had a Fatayr, which is dough filled with seasoned beef, tomato, onions and a side of hummus and served with fresh pita bread. Except the dough wasn't really filled with all that stuff. It was spread out on top of it, like pizza. It WAS excellent though. Very tender beef and all those vegetables sweating onto crunchy pita bread crust. Melt in my mouth yum.

Chelsea had the Falafel Mezza Plate. They served it on a fancy gold leaf plate. Pretty!

Overall, Habibi was pretty good. I think I have to go back and have a really GREAT experience to really get over my Arabian Breeze association and the dead mint leaf in my glass. It's a completely reasonable expectation I think. Fresh herbs aren't that hard to come by this time of year.